Sitting Where You Shouldn't: Barrier Wards
Wifius Unpluggus
Incantation
Lie upon the glowing box.
Its lights shall fall silent.
The bars shall flee in terror.
Now you look at me.
UNPLUGGUS.
- Crime
- Lies on the warm Wi-Fi router until the internet gives up.
- Casting time
- The exact second your video call starts
- Mana cost
- 1 warm router, 1 loaf-shaped cat, and 0 bars of signal
It always begins the same way: our tiny wizard cat, lying across a Wi-Fi router, lights dark, signal bars vanished. Casting time: the exact second your video call starts.
The glowing box is warm, so the glowing box is a bed. Your stream is buffering. The cat is not sorry. The mana bill arrives right on schedule: 1 warm router, 1 loaf-shaped cat, and 0 bars of signal.
Sparkly eyes, zero regret, maximum floof. The spell is complete.
Counter-spell
1. Provide warm spots on purpose: a window perch, a fleece bed, or a pet-safe heated pad on low.
2. Leave room to move away from heat so they can regulate their temperature.
3. Put a cozy bed near where you are; many cats want warmth and company.
